Heroes Not Zombies

Whatever we encounter, whatever we look at, there is always more to know, always another aspect to discover.

My work as a doctor depended on being able to understand people, and that depended on being able to hear their story.

To hear someone’s story takes time and requires attentive, non judgemental listening.

I wanted to hear what they were experiencing now, but also to hear how that experience had arisen, what were the circumstances from which this experience emerged and what sense did they, themselves, make of it all.

A very common feedback was “I’ve never told anyone what I’ve just told you. You know me better now than anyone else does”. I knew what they meant but I always thought, and often said, “I’m pleased, but we’ve only spent an hour together and one hour in a whole life is very little. I’m sure there’s a lot more to understand.”

You’re never finished understanding someone. You never have all the information or “the whole story”, because you haven’t lived the life they’ve lived. I found that even when I thought I had a good sense of someone, there was always another layer, another angle, another perspective.