In “Citadelle” (“Wisdom of the Sands” in English translation), Saint-Exupery (in the chapter I’ve just read), talks about how life, as he says, doesn’t cheat. We get what we focus on. He makes the point that if we focus on discipline to create freedom, what we get is discipline, and if we wage war to create peace, what we get is war. We can tell ourselves we have one particular goal, but what we do in real life is manifest our real goals.
For, when all is said and done, you establish that on which your heart was set; that with which you concerned yourself and nothing else. Even if you made it your concern to fight against it. Thus, when I fight my foe, I establish him, for I shape and harden him on my anvil.
There’s enough in this to feel it touches on an important truth, but something too which disturbs. I don’t hold much with people who blame patients for their suffering. The world, and life, seem much more complex to me, than to be reducible to such a simplistic notion. We always have choices and our choices are enormously important in creating our experiences but we are also affected by the choices of others and the randomness Nature at an individual level (don’t think any of choose earthquakes or twisters for example)
But, as I mull this idea over I find myself thinking (inevitably!) about health and disease. Disease can be quite overwhelming. Pain, exhaustion, stiffness, loss of muscle power…….can be all-consuming, colouring every aspect of life. All of these symptoms draw our attention towards our disease and before we know it, our life, even our sense of self, can become synonymous with our disease. How to find a path to health in there? Well, disease does need to be addressed. But if it becomes the entire, or even the greatest, focus, then disease is what we will experience. To become healthy, we need to do something else. We need to focus in health.
So, what’s health?
I’ve asked this question of a variety of different groups of health care professionals over the last couple of weeks. Here’s my challenge. Describe health, without referring to disease or illness. In other words, describe health as a positive phenomenon in its own right. What does it mean to you to be healthy? (and remember no use of disease, illness or symptom references! No saying it’s when you don’t have “x”!)
Once you know what healthy actually is for you, then it’s likely that focusing on it, paying attention to it, setting your heart on it, will start to bring you the experience of health itself.
I have bi-polar disorder, but bi-polar disorder does *NOT* havae me. When/if you can reach that realization, then you will find a path to health. Don’t let it stop you, don’t let it slow your steps or trip you. Focus on what you want to accomplish, not on your limitations. *smile*
I have to say – that I have chosen health, even though my body has illness in it. By choosing health, I mean having a healthy mind, and spirit.
It really does make a difference. Life is so much better if you choose to be positive. If all one does as see their lives as being disabled, then disabled you will be. You will not push your limits to find out how abled you can be instead.
Every single day of my life is a choice. Today, I am choosing to be healthy…. even if my body doesnt agree.
I’ve not really taken the time to think this through carefully, I’m just posting the first thing that comes into my head but I think, to me, health is having the energy and the ability to do the things you want to do in life.
As you said, the notion of ‘getting what you focus on’ is complicated. While I do truly believe that we have a responsibility for the choices we make in life, I also get really angry every time I turn around and find out that yet another lovely, caring, undeserving person I know has been struck down with some terrible illness or tragedy in their life. How do you reconcile the two?
katk and amber, I so agree with you. An illness is NOT a whole person. We are ALWAYS more than any illness we are experiencing. As I see it, health is an experience and we are sensing, feeling, thinking, meaning-seeking creatures……which gives us ample scope for finding the experience of health.
Rebecca, I like your definition. Health certainly includes have the energy and the ability to do what you want to do in life.
That other point about people you admire getting sick? Well, Rebecca, that’s a huge subject and I sure don’t have all the answers but I don’t think people get sick because they DESERVE to get sick. Illness, accidents, tragedies strike everyone irrespective of who they are. What makes the difference though between two people who are struck by a similar event? A death of a loved one for example? Or an accident or infection? What makes the difference is who that person is, how they experience that event and how they respond to it. Yes, we do have responsibility for the choices we make, but mostly I think in the way that Viktor Frankl described it. Let me paraphrase…….stuff happens, but what makes us who we are is how we take a stand in response to the stuff that happens. OK, not Frankl’s language, but I think he was onto something with that idea
You touched what’s I always preach. Can’t believe parallels between yours and mine thinking.
Wayne and I are very healthy and fit (at ages 62 and 60)…but there have been times of small manifestations of something different: it simply felt like a ‘problem’ was planning to step in.
We re-equipped our thought forces and other resources and keep winning no matter what.
Just TWO out of a few examples from our life.
ONE EXAMPLE is Wayne was literally attacked by toxic mold- It was positively tested in his blood, he felt miserable, his energy was all gone.
We knew it wasn’t anything he did wrong in our lifestyle to encourage the problem. It was from outside of Wayne’s body.
We religiously focused even stronger than ever on our lifestyle (that is workout, NOT eating about 98% of foods from general marketplace, taking very-very special supplements).
Strongly believing in focus ON what we want to get or get back, not in focus on what we despise
– We won his battle.
At the final test, our family doc who is Asian
said Wayne did the right thing and we take the right super-supplements…And he (the Asian doc) takes the same exact supplements to stay healthy and fit!!!
ANOTHER EXAMPLE. Sometimes I have light pain in my shoulder. Before it starts getting bigger, I never allow it grow to bigger pain.
( No pain-killers ever, even when I have a headache which is probably once in 3 years.)
I simply exercise that shoulder even more vigorously than ever, and increase our miraculous supplements.
After less than 1 day my pain in 100% gone- as a results of my focus.
Your result flows where your focus goes! – Is my firm believe, as it’s yours.
Have Another Healthy Day – We all can…if we choose to!
I’ve not read anyone else’s comments yet, so if I echo what they say, it’s pure coincidence (or we’re speaking truth – one or the other, perhaps both!).
For me, health is the feeling of all the different facets of my life functioning at their peak. My relationships are strong and thriving. I’m challenged in my professional life. My body’s different systems are working easily and well. Health, for me, is as much a mental state as it is a physical one; happiness, satisfaction and joy are healthy – sadness, guilt or anxiety are not.
I understand where you’re going with the idea of not “blaming” patients for their disease. At the same time, though, I really do believe that, on one level or another, we choose certain experiences in this lifetime (up to and including the seemingly random things like earthquakes and plane crashes). It’s what we do with those experiences, though, that makes us who we are because most of us aren’t willing to accept conscious responsibility for our choices on that level. Being able to accept it, I think, would make a huge difference in how most people deal with “adversity” in whatever guise it takes. It’s really all one big learning experience.
I wrote about this idea once – hang on, let me find it…. got it!
http://theinnerdoor.wordpress.com/2008/03/12/closing-in-on-it/
Not quite the same idea, but close…
Health for me is loving and approving of myself and knowing the world is a place of challenge, love, beauty, joy, power, — with no element of life set up against me, but rather always working with me for right action and betterment.
[…] positive psychology movement grew out of the understanding that whatever we focus on gets bigger. So if you try to treat someone’s fear by focusing on reducing that fear, you still end up […]
Very good article. I can’t help focussing on my health issues constantly.
I now will try to change my focus on what is good about my health. Also on what is it that I want.