How often do you find yourself going over something upsetting? Something someone said or did which you found hurtful? Hurts have an impact. They make their marks on us. The bigger the hurt, the deeper, more long-lasting the mark.
Is there anything we can do reduce the impact? Or do we have to just stand and accept whatever comes our way, feeling the impacts deeply, and for the rest of our lives?
Whatever builds up our resilience, both reduces the strength of any impact, and increases our ability to bounce back, to stand back up, to find a way to go forward.
One aspect of resilience is equanimity. Balance. Stability. A kind of strength. Over centuries in many traditions and cultures people have practiced meditation to gain this kind of strength. One of the goals of meditation is increased equanimity, or greater resilience. You can’t stop events from happening, but you can have an influence on how you experience those events. My meditation teacher used the following analogy (the photos are mine!)
A mark in rock lasts a long time
A mark in sand disappears more quickly
Imagine what it’s like to make the mark on water
Now imagine what it’s like to make the mark in the air
Regular meditation practice builds resilience. Things still happen, but more and more, what people say, what people do, has less of an impact. You begin to experience less marks in the stone, less in the sand, more in the water, or, ultimately, in the air.
I like that analogy.
Heroes Not Zombies 
What a great post – the photos and the topic. I too like this analogy and need to work more on the meditation.
I understand what you are saying. I think it is wise. I like the way you write and I also like your photos. If you don’t mind, I would like to offer a thought on this subject. You say that what people do and say to us can leave marks. Why is that? If people would only realize the simple truth then there would be no marks to be had. If someone calls you a dog, you can let it mark you. You can say to your self, “I’m not a dog! Why did he call me a dog!? I can’t believe that *** called me a dog!” And when you do that, you are actually marking yourself and letting the other person “win”. Because thinking like that means that you have called yourself a dog 3 more times by repeating it over and over in your head. The other option is, if someone calls you a dog, turn around and look at your bum, if you don’t see a tail, take a deep breath because you aren’t a dog and let it go. Go on with your day and don’t think about it again. You can acknowledge that someone mistreated you, you can forgive that person, and you can let it go. I think it is important that people understand that they can act or react. You can choose your own actions or simply react and get depressed and upset with out choosing to control yourself. You DO NOT have to be marked by other people. It is your choice. Why do we let people hurt us? Weeeeeee have control over our own minds. We can control what we let in and what we choose to shut out.
Thank you for letting me say my piece. Again, I think you are a fantastic writer! Keep up the good work. I will be back around to see some more of your writings. Thank you!