Heroes Not Zombies

Whenever I look at this photo I think of the relationship between a mother and her child. We humans have evolved with a uniquely long period of nurture for our newborn. Our species needs more care and attention for many more months than most others do in the earliest phase of life. From the perspective of evolution that must grant us some advantage, and, as best I understand it, the current thinking is that it allows the development of the brain and the capacities for social interaction.

Is there a more stark example of how much individual human beings need others? None of us would have survived on our own, and although we develop much greater autonomy as we mature, we still thrive best when we are nourished and nurtured.

I think within us all are two aspects, themes, or strands of being. You might think of them as energies….like yin and yang. Or you might think of them as feminine and masculine principles, perhaps related to Mother and Father archetypes or gods. Or you might think of them as the right and left hemispheres of the cerebral cortex and the ways in which each engages with the world.

I have four verbs in my mind when I contemplate these two energies, archetypes or principles. Nourish, nurture, provide and protect.

I know we can’t reduce everything to four simple words and I also know that as society and culture evolves we develop a more complex way of understanding these actions….a way which doesn’t limit the feminine and masculine to the genders of female and male. After all, we have all always had both within us.

This particular photo makes me think of the first two verbs – nourish and nurture. It seems to me that that’s how we begin in life. We start within the womb being nourished by our mothers. Then when we are born our mother’s milk is the first, and for many the only, food we receive. Nourishment is mainly about food….it’s about supplying us with enough of the right food that we need to grow our body and brain. Think of how quickly a baby grows into a toddler, and from there into a child, then teenager, and how much they change in those first ten to twenty years. It’s pretty astonishing and we kind of take it for granted.

Nurture involves more than nutrition. It involves care, encouragement, support and education. How we are treated by our significant carers in the first five years affects the size of the brain and the number of connections which are forged between the millions of neurones. You can imagine how important that is for our future abilities and wellbeing.

In my heart, I feel moved by an image like this. This relationship of care, this relationship of nourishing and nurturing, is so important, it really can’t be overstated.

I hope we see more of this in the years to come – better nutrition for all, more care, attention and nurturing for all.

That would be a good start, don’t you think?