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Archive for the ‘personal growth’ Category

apres le marche

This is a time of year when we think about our lives isn’t it? A time for doing some clearing up, getting things in order, making plans, decisions, resolutions and so on…..

I was passing through the main market square in Aix in the other day and suddenly I saw just how beautiful clearing up could be! Yeah, sure, you can look at a scene like this and see a horrendous pile of garbage…..but then, just pause, look again…..don’t you think this scene is incredibly appealing?

apres le marche

You can see where this is going, can’t you? 2010? A better year? A year where we tackle what needs tackled? Where we clear up what we don’t want cluttering our lives any more? Make good choices this year.

And, hey, even if you don’t do that…..at least I challenge you to see the beauty, the wonder, the “emerveillement” all around you, every, single, day.

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dawn stirling station

How does your day begin?

I took this photo of the sun rising behind the old factories on the other side of Stirling station yesterday, and it got me thinking about the start of the day. Every day the sun comes up (but we don’t always notice it). In some cultures and traditions this simple, daily event was/is marked with some kind of ritual or acknowledgment – some “salute to the sun”, or some contemplation or prayer. I guess it’s no surprise in a country like Scotland where its not likely you can actually see the sun every morning that we don’t have that kind of start to our day.

But how DO you start your day?

Do you start on auto-pilot? Some combination of washed/dressed/breakfast/out the door? If so, is there a point where you take over from the auto-pilot? At what point in the day do start to live more consciously?

Or do you start your day with some personal ritual of waking or beginning? Feel free to share if you’d like.

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I took a walk at the weekend. Up through the Birks of Aberfeldy. Robert Burns wrote a poem about this place. Here he is –

Burns writing The Birks

He wrote well before me, in an earlier time and an earlier season.

I went to the Birks to find leaves. I love the colours of autumn. Come and have a look at some of the amazing golds, and reds, and silvers, and yellows, and greens, and bronzes I found…..

yellow splash

autumn bridge

higher turns first

silver forest

silver birch

forest

But what I really like most about this time of year is how you can see change happening right before your eyes. It’s true, change is always with us. Life is dynamic. Nothing can be reduced to a fixed, final and complete understanding. There’s always more to see, more to learn. There are always new ways to explore, growth and change to pursue and enjoy.

leaves turning

red tinge

shadow leaf

There’s always wonder.

There’s always hope.

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Atlantic lighting

If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work, and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

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I’ve just read Muriel Rukeyser’s The Life of Poetry (ISBN 0-96381-833-3). An extraordinary book.

Here is the paragraph which hit me right between the eyes. Here’s where she hits the nail, squarely, on the head….

If our imaginative response to life were complete, if we were fully conscious of emotion, if we apprehended surely the relations that make us know the truth and the relations that make us know the beautiful,we would be….what? The heroes of our myths, acting perfectly among these faculties, loving appropriately and living with appropriate risk, spring up at the question. We invented them to let us approach that life. But they remind us of our own lives. They offer us a hope and a perspective, not of the past in which they were made – not that alone – but of the future. For if we lived in full response to the earth, to each other, and to ourselves, we would not breathe a supernatural climate; we would be more human.

It’s hard to put this in other words, but her insight into the value of imagination, of being aware of our emotional responses, and of how our relations to ourselves, others and to the rest of nature is the key to becoming fully human is fabulous.

What do we become if we develop such a FULL response to LIFE? Heroes. The heroes of our own myths. And THIS is how we gain both perspective on life and hope for the future.

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A study by psychologists has looked at the common recommendation found in self-help books – affirmations. You know the kind of thing…..where you are encouraged to repeat over to yourself phrases like “I am a lovable person”, or “I accept myself completely.”

What they found was that in people who had high self-esteem, these affirmations helped them to feel slightly better, but in those who had low self-esteem, the affirmations made them feel worse!

As the authors concluded, “Repeating positive self-statements may benefit certain people [such as individuals with high self-esteem] but backfire for the very people who need them the most.”

As I’ve said before, one size fits all interventions are not what they claim to be. They don’t fit all at all!

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Here’s an interesting study published in the journal, “Brain, Behaviour and Immunity”. In a nutshell, they’ve found a relationship between personality traits of extraversion and the levels of an inflammatory chemical in the blood (Interleukin-6). The more extraverted, the lower the levels of this chemical. Why’s that a good thing? Well, the higher levels are indicative of increased inflammatory activity (in aging women the difference between high and low levels can result in a two fold increase in mortality over five years). Many serious chronic conditions are thought to result from increased inflammatory activity.

There’s a reassuring increase in studies of this type (in PNI – “Psychoneuroimmunology”) and they’re beginning to give us a better scientific understanding of the interconnectedness of all our body systems, and to break down the rather naive idea that the body and the mind are separate.

This particular study has hooked my attention because of its focus on extraversion. I suppose neither extraversion, nor intraversion, seem, on the face of it, to be healthy characteristics, so I was keen to understand exactly what the psychologists were interpreting as extraversion. Apparently Karl Jung described extraverts as focused on the world around them and happiest in the presence of others. Psychological models of character have come a long way since his day and this particular group of researchers worked with a model known as the “Five Factor Model” of personality. The five factors are –

  1. Extraversion
  2. Emotional Stability
  3. Agreeableness
  4. Conscientiousness
  5. Openness to Experience

Here’s one definition of extraversion

Extraversion is marked by pronounced engagement with the external world. Extraverts enjoy being with people, are full of energy, and often experience positive emotions. They tend to be enthusiastic, action-oriented, individuals who are likely to say “Yes!” or “Let’s go!” to opportunities for excitement. In groups they like to talk, assert themselves, and draw attention to themselves.

The particular element of extraversion associated with the lower inflammatory markers is “dispositional activity” – which the researchers are also dubbing “life force” (its the extent to which you wholeheartedly engage with life really)

I think that’s fascinating. As you know, my three key characteristics of health are adaptability, creativity and ENGAGEMENT, and my palette of factors for a good life includes a sense of wonder in the everyday (“emerviellement” in the “quotidien”)

I was intruiged to learn more about the Five Factor model. Wikipedia, as usual, has a good entry. But if you want to find out what the five factor analysis says about your own personality, try here where they have an excellent, free online, instrument.


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This blog is called heroes not zombies because I believe we all tend to sleepwalk through life (in a kind of zombie way), but that we have the opportunity to wake up and be the heroes of our own stories. So, I was especially struck by the following passage in “Metaphors we live by” –

Self-understanding requires unending negotiation and renegotiation of the meaning of your experiences to yourself……It involves the constant construction of new coherences in your life, coherences that give new meaning to old experiences. The process of self-understanding is the continual development of new life stories for yourself.

I think this is SO on the button. It grasps the dynamic, creative, ever-changing, ever-growing process of understanding which comes about through telling, editing, revising and re-telling our life stories. These stories are not fantasy of course. Rather they are the process of creating meaning from our experiences. They do this by developing coherences. We continuously strive to make sense of our experiences, and making sense means building on the existing coherent stories we tell about ourselves to make them more coherent in the light of our newest experiences. Additionally, this passage hits the nail on the head by pointing out that the new coherences cast a new light on older experiences. This is the healing potential of understanding.

Myths are the key stories which create our lifeworlds. Myths are not false stories. They are our most fundamental ones.  As Lakoff and Johnson say

Myths provide ways of comprehending experience; they give order to our lives. Like metaphors, myths are necessary for making sense of what goes on around us. All cultures have myths, and people cannot function without myth any more than they can function without metaphor.

Are you aware of the metaphors, the myths, the stories which you use to comprehend your experience?

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While away on a trip to Japan recently I came across a news item about Bhutan’s development of a national happiness index. I’d read about this a few years ago and thought it was interesting but maybe just a gimmick or a passing fancy. I think it was the King of Bhutan who decided that instead of measuring and reporting the “GDP” (“Gross Domestic Product”) of the country each year, it would be more useful to measure and report the “GNH” (“Gross National Happiness”). Well, apparently others, including the IMF asked the rulers of Bhutan exactly how they thought they could measure such a thing, and this has encouraged a wide-ranging and elaborate process of developing and experimenting with “tools” to measure the GNH.
They decided that happiness involved significant achievements in each of nine core dimensions of which happiness and well-being were constituted.

1.    Psychological Well-being
2.   Time Use
3.   Community Vitality
4.   Culture
5.   Health
6.   Education
7.   Environmental Diversity
8.   Living Standard
9.   Governance
Each of these domains is made up a number of indicators and you can read descriptions of each of these dimensions and their indicators here

This work is way too vast to reproduce in a blog post but I encourage you to follow the link to the Bhutan government’s site about this and have a browse. The range of questions they ask is astonishing, comprehensive and holistic. They have a distinct cultural flavour which is appropriate to Bhutan but the general principles are certainly transferrable to other cultures. What fascinates me is the emphasis given by the this approach on the subjective experiences of the population. It seems a serious attempt to put the sum of personal experience above the sum of material goods and wealth.

When I returned home, I stumbled on the “New Economics Foundation”  who have produced an interesting report entitled “National Accounts of Well-being” which compares quality of life indices across 22 European countries. This work covers some similar domains to the Bhutan work, but it reads almost like a subset of that latter project. In particular they consider Personal well-being, Social well-being and Work well-being. Social well-being is split into Supportive relationships and Trust and belonging, whilst Personal well-being is split into Emotional well-being, Satisfying life, Vitality, Resilience and self-esteem, and Positive functioning (each of which are further subdivided)
The results of this European work can be explored in a fascinating interactive website here

I find both of these projects fascinating. They demonstrate serious attempts to value human experience over that of indicators of material production and consumption. What do you think?

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If control is a delusion, and it’s pursuit is ultimately futile, what would be a better strategy? Given the complexity of human, social and global life, accurate predictions are not feasible. The grander the scale of the prediction, the more likely it will turn out to be wrong.
However, at a personal level, we need some degree of predictability in life, some sense that not all of life is random or chaotic. Maybe a better strategy is to expect the typical but be prepared to cope with the atypical. You can apply this idea at any level – personal, political, economic, or environmental.
What we need in order to cope better with the unpredictability of reality is resilience.

But what is resilience?
Resilience involves a number of different factors and characteristics. Let’s examine some of them briefly, just to lay out a map for further exploration.
Take a look at these photos of bamboo.

bamboo

bamboo shadow leaves

Bamboo has two essential qualities which make it so resilient. Strength and flexibility.
At first glance, these can seem like two mutually opposite qualities. How can something be  both flexible and strong? How can something bend and resist? How can you change and not change?
Resilience involves many factors but let’s first examine these two apparently contradictory ones. Both are needed, and neither can be considered either superior to the other, or more essential than the other.

The ability change or adapt.
Flexibility is the ability to adapt to changing circumstances or environments. We may have to change our behaviour if we find ourselves in changed situations. If we can only behave in one particular way, then that lack of flexibility, that inability to change what we do, reduces our capacity to adapt, and therefore our resilience. We are less able to cope with change when we ourselves are unable to change.
Along with flexibility, we need spontaneity. An inability to be spontaneous will restrict our options, reduce our choices and our strategies for successful coping. Spontaneity involves not only a change in behaviour, but new behaviour. In biological and physical terms such new behaviour has been termed “emergence”. Emergence is the capacity of a system to exhibit previously unseen behaviours. This is a core creative process. Creativity is the ability to make, or see, things anew. It’s the ability to make changes, to make a difference. Creativity, of course, is highly dependent on imagination. Without imagination, how can we move to somewhere we’ve never been before? A change of behaviour is not, of course, always about brand new actions. It can be a change to a previously learned strategy, one which worked before in similar circumstances. In other words, the flexible aspect of resilience also involves the ability to learn, and that entails both memory and communication (after all one of our greatest strengths as a species is our ability to learn from others – our ability to communicate over space and time)
The other side of resilience is the ability to resist change. There’s something about the coherence and integrity of a system that requires strength, stamina and the determination to pursue a particular path. If I try to change to fit in with every change of everyone around me, I’ll begin to lose my sense of self. To be resilient I need energy, strength, the ability to persist in the face of adversity. I need the capacity to conserve my life, my health, the capacity to sustain and to persist to a significant degree.
So there’s the paradox at the heart of resilience – flexibility and sustainability. The ability to change and the ability to persist.
I think this is our agenda for the future at all levels. Changing our focus from control to resilience. We need a new politics, a new economics and a new way of living based on resilience, not illusory control.

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