In the A to Z of Becoming, the third verb is C, for “choose”
Choose….hmmm, what will I write about choosing? I’ve got a few ideas rattling round my brain, so I’m going to share several of them, and then YOU can choose which inspire you most, or which you want to explore further for yourself.
The first thing I thought about was “choice theory” – the work of William Glasser. I like Glasser’s emphasis on how we create our own experience of reality through the choices we make. I like how he rejects the “external control theory” which suggests we are just puppets or automatons having our buttons pushed. I like his holistic approach to psychology, and, most of all I like his emphasis on verbs.
Secondly, I thought of how empowering it is to move your brain from default reactive mode, to response mode, and how a crucial step in developing that skill is to consciously, mindfully make choices. In reactive mode, we are pretty much on autopilot, blindly following the scripts of others, and it can feel like that. It can feel like we are the trapped victims of circumstances, of society, of others’ choices. Developing response mode, creates that little gap (see “getting neutral“) which allows us to become more conscious of what is happening, and, thereby, to take the opportunity to choose which response we want to make.
Thirdly, I thought of “Amor Fati”, the ancient teaching to “love your Fate”, which is actually advice to fully accept and enjoy the reality of the present, rather than suffering through wishing things weren’t the way they are (see the “suffering gap”)
Fourthly, I thought of choosing a path (like in the photo above which I took in a garden in Japan), and of how every path takes a different route, even if it leads to the same destination. I saw a TV programme during the holidays in December where a regular rambler walked from the West to the East of Scotland up in the far North. He came across countless old drovers paths (where the cattlemen would drive their cattle from the Highlands down to the markets in the South), and shepherd’s paths, and the paths the crofters would take to go from one croft to another, and the hiking routes, and…..well, you get the idea……the wild, open, sparsely populated areas of Scotland are criss-crossed by a myriad of paths, so when you want to walk from one coast to another, you have plenty of choices. Each of those choices will bring its own experiences and its own discoveries.
Fifthly, I thought of how sometimes I deliberately choose to walk down a different road, or to visit a different cafe, or to catch a different train, just to wake myself up and keep me aware that today is indeed a unique and amazing day.
Does any of this inspire you?
Which of these five explorations of choosing appeals to you most?
Which will you choose today?
